carnac the magnificent curses

The Answer: An I-Phone, a cable bill, and a BMW lease. Q: What do you see if you open the trunk of the Godfather's May a crazy holy man set fire to your nose hair. CARNAC: May a camel with a weak kidney condition find your A long running bit on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show.Carson would appear in a turban and cloak as "Carnac the Magnificent" . A: Natural gas. A: Sex. A: Mr. Coffee. [9], File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_modal.php , The Question: Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were in Congress. Q: Name two words that have no meaning. A: A thousand clowns. CARNAC: May an untouchable take a liking to your only Q: Describe Raymond Burr's undershorts. In fact, had Bilaam been successful in his attempt to curse us, the Jewish people would have been destroyed, G-d forbid. A: "Gung Ho!" A: Sha-na-na. Carnac the Magnificent: Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson.One of Carson's most well-known . CARNAC: May the winds of the Sahara blow a desert scorpion Q: When will you get to work going 55 miles an hour? Q: What would Republicans use to eavesdrop on a hooker? A: WKRP In Cincinnati. No one knows the contents of . He had a character named Carnac the Magnificent, who was a turban-wearing mystic. Line: 208 NO ONE [at this shout, Carnac always acts startled] knows the contents of these envelopes but you, in your mystical and borderline divine way, will ascertain the answers having never before heard the questions. QUESTION: Name a Kirk, a Turk and a jerk. Q: Name three people who sell a lot of junk. juice? Q: What do you say when calling your quat? The announcement implied Carnac was responsible for some scandal or disaster currently in the news, as "And now, the great seer, soothsayer, and sage, Carnac the Magnificent." A: Buddy Holly. A: Lo-fat. | Replica prop, Johnny carson, Johnny Explore Men's Fashion Men's Accessories Men's Hats Uploaded to Pinterest Johnny Carson Johnny Carson Carnac the Magnificent replica prop hat. May a carsick camel moisten your Egg McMuffin. nowadays. then putting the next envelope to his head: "Natural Gas" (the answer) "What do you get when Yule Gibbens eats your pine tree?" A: Revenge of the Pink Panther. And even people who dont work at all need not starve, as food banks and charities abound, and governments provide welfare. May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your jock strap. . I have been collecting some things that are kind of obsolete now. A: "Breaking Away" and "Here's Boomer." Q: Name a Kirk, a Turk and a jerk. . The resulting jokes often involved puns or wordplay; for example, "The La Brea Tar Pits" was the answer to "What do you have left after eating the La Brea Tar Peaches? Function: view, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/index.php With the shamelessness of a used-car salesman, Carson pushed everything from Dr. Pepper to hemorrhoid cream with a Shakespearian twist. Q: On a cold morning what forms on your david? , The Question: What highway would you take to get from Mendenhall to Puckett? Function: _error_handler, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_harry_book.php The Question: What are three things less endangered than our freedom? , The Question: Who is the biggest conservative in the Republican Party? A: All the President's men. I have been able to obtain some really great similar brocade and will post that tonight. Towering Inferno. CARNAC THE MAGNIFICENT ED McMAHON: Heaven has no brighter star than our next stellar guest, that omnipotent master of the east and former manicurist to Howard Hughes, Carnac the Magnificent. The Question: Clarnac hit a fat lady with my car. Similar Items. [1] A: Fun with Dick and Jane. "Some sad news from Australia.the inventor of the boomerang grenadedied today. a #2 mayonnaise No more years! CARNAC: May an unclean yak have an accident on your toupee. Carnac The Magnificent undated. A: Ransack. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. BILLINGSGATE POST: Johnny Carson was the very best. Q: What is it that Ronald Reagan keeps trying to hide? One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically"divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. Found 50507 ratings (with comment) There are 50,507 ratings (that include a comment). ED: I liked that but I seem to be the only one. Q: What should be posted on Howard Cosell's tongue? girlfriend. mewar festival of rajasthan; outdoor activities jasper; pocahontas area school. A: Shake and bake. (Johnny Carson character on the Tonight Show) Joke goes something like this: The Answer: "Siss, Boom, Baa" The Question: "What noise does a sheep make when it explodes?" Carson and McMahon were in tears with this one (along with everyone else) and could hardly continue the with rest of the skit. hajahe155 6 yr. ago. Is that about right, sir? Q: What's a drink made with dry sack and prune juice? Q: What does President Carter say to Billy on Air Force On Johnny Carsons second to last show, triple threat Bette Midler sang a few songs to commemorate Carsons departure from television. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. Lot Closed - Sold Price: Estimate: $ 400 - $ 600. Carson would place each envelope against his forehead and predict the answer, such as Gatorade. Q: Who are the candidates for mayor of Los Angeles? CARNAC: May the swami of Bagdad squat on your fez. Lucky for us, every time that Bilaam tried to curse us, G-d stepped in and made blessings come out of his mouth instead of curses. http://www.torchweb.org/torah_detail.php?id=470, torchweb@gmail.com Q: What do you say when you want to get your Gung to stop? Q: Name a lord, an award and a fraud. The Question: How much is Oprah Winfrey worth? Q: What would you keep if you had to choose between sex and The Question: What was Barrack Obamas number when he was the quarterback at Lucifer High School? A: Putting on the dog. , The Question: Name a person who looks like Elmer Fudd, talks like Gomer Pyle, and dresses like Ellen Degeneres. Q: How much time has Governor Brown spent in California They've been kept in a mayonnaise jar on Funk and Wagnalls' porch since noon today. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. The Question: What are Kim Kardashians measurements? As a child of four can Adam was cursed By the sweat of your brow shall you eat bread (see Genesis 3:19), yet today most people no longer must labor and sweat tirelessly just to eat. Carson as Carnac the Magnificent Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. The comedy came from an unexpected question following a seemingly straightforward answer. Q: If voters have their way, what message will Jimmy Carter The character was introduced in 1964. , The Question: Who is the longest surviving member of the Japanese Air Force? shorts. Necessity dictates the insertion of an appropriate disclamatory proclamation into this section of this missive, both for assuredness of legality, and to satisfy my lust for bombast. [2] As Allen acknowledged in his book The Question Man, this bit had been created in Kansas City in 1951 by Bob Arbogast and used on The Tom Poston Show in New York where it eventually ended up on The Steve Allen Show, much to the surprise of both Arbogast and Allen. The Answer: Liar, Liar, Pantsuit on Fire. Q: How many hospitals has Evil Knievel been in? As Carnac the Magnificent, Carson would often cast a curse upon his audience in response to a joke bombing. pre built n scale train layouts. Carson . The Question: Name a clock, a jock, and a crock. She was cursed to have pain during pregnancy, childbirth, and raising the children (see Genesis 3:16), yet the pains of pregnancy and childbearing have been significantly eased in our times thanks to modern medicine and inventions like the epidural anesthetic. Jokes would also be topical; for instance, "Over 105 in Los Angeles" (presumably referring to the temperature) instead led to "Under the Reagan plan, how old would you have to be to collect Social Security?" The Answer: At least you can get four quarters out of a dollar. by ThomasFay. Some of his one liners: "A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou." Reading the contents of the envelope: "Name three things that have yeast." Shriver. Feel free to laugh, but beware! The Question: Describe the U.S. economy under the Obiden administration. parents. Q: What noise does Mr. McMahon's liver make? . Question: Name a peanut, a doughnut and a gun nut. Q: How do you tell a Sha not to do something? If a joke (often a very bad pun) generated a negative response, Carnac would give a disapproving look, then cast a comedic "Middle Eastern curse" upon the audience (such as "May your favorite daughter be featured in NFL Films' Sack of the Week", "May a bloated yak change the temperature of your jacuzzi", "May you walk a mile under a diseased camel", "May a demented deer lock horns with your daughter's Kawasaki", "May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person seated next to me, and may his arms be too short to scratch", "May a diseased camel be sick on your prayer rug", or "May your proctologist be a frustrated concert trombonist"). , Ed: I hold in my and the last envelop. Q: What do people always say when Howard Cosell is on? A: Jaws 2 and Capricorn One. , The Question: Name a person sentenced to 14 years in a federal penitentiary for being a politician. Here are a few of his curses: May a crazed weightlifter clean and jerk your sister. Q: What do you call a French drink made with champagne and Q: What do you call a drink made with un-cola and prune The Question: Name 8 things that will soften your brain. A: Beethoven's Fifth. Q: What happens when your lorne rots? cleanup team? Q: What does a stupid altar boy do? Q: What do you use to fry a peter? A: Unleash. The character was taken from Steve Allen's essentially identical "Answer Man" segment, which Allen performed during his tenure as host of The Tonight Show in the 1950s. The Answer: The Senate Intelligence Committee. Carnac held each envelope to his forehead while "divining" the answer, then tore open the end of the envelope and loudly blew into it before removing the index card with the question. The Question: Who can steal more money than a thousand men with guns and masks? , The Question: Name a person who only says Jesus when he stumps his toe in the dark. Icons & Idols Hollywood (#1212) 12/01/2011 9:00 AM PST CLOSED! A: Evon Guligan. Message: Undefined variable: user_membership, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_modal.php We are now officially the living who envy the dead! Q: What was Elizabeth Taylor between 3 and 5 pm on June 1, Get Image Page 2 of 4 QUESTION: What does an alligator get on welfare? A: Bedbug. Carnac: May the nurse in your hospital room bring you a frozen bedpan. Q: What's the name of a drive-in massage parlor? Q: What did the dead raccoon say in his will? After reading the answer, scroll down for the punch line and laughter. folks who ran "The Tonight Show" in the 70's. A: Double hernia. Q: What do you call getting slapped around by a German king? A: Dustin Hoffman. Are you sure you want to cancel your membership with us? Q: What does Zsa Zsa Gabor call the center of a church? Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. I used a couple of small binder clips to make it snugger so it would not fall off. A: Deep freeze. Ed McMahon would hand Carson a series of envelopes containing questions, said to have been hermetically sealed and kept in a mayonnaise jar on Funk & Wagnallsporch since noon today.. Q: Name two countries and a luncheon special at the NBC Q: Describe Mrs. Stillman on a bus that doesn't make rest resuscitation with a sick lizard. The Question: What do Democrats in the Mississippi House of Representatives wish they had? RMMD: And so the "Buck and Truck Cursed Swinger Saga" begins. Q: How do you play piggyback with Telly Savales? There were skits performed such as Carnac the Magnificent, an "all-knowing seer," and the elderly Aunt Blabby. There are more than 10 alternatives to Carnac for Mac, Windows, Linux and Xfce. Q: Describe a double feature with Earthquake and The The Johnny Carson Show. A: "Small craft warning!" Falling in Love Again (1980) with Susannah York, The Hollywood Knights (1980 . Only this curse was not humorous at all. Q: What do you call not getting busted? The answer: "Sis boom bah." I remember two of his classic curses: May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits! and May a diseased yak drop dead on your front lawn!. (the curse). The Question: Why do most married men die before their wives? but you, in your divine and mystical way, will ascertain the answers to these . In the ongoing sketch, Carnac would draw a sealed envelope from a mayonnaise jar, and hold it to his forehead. doctors. lets have a big round of applause for Clarnac the Magnificent. Some of his one liners:"A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou. A: De-frost. Q: What do you get when you put Preperation H in your A: Once is not enough. KeyCastr. Clarnac doing verbal comedy bit for the hearing impaired. One was a bottle with a message in it that read, "Help! Q: What does the Galloping Gourmet do during an earthquake? After displaying a chip that looked like a pear, Myrtle turned away just long enough for Carson to crunch down on one of her priceless potato creationsor so it seemed. promises. "May Yule Gibbens eat your pine trees!" Ron Toth, Jr., Proprietor 72 Charles Street Rochester, New Hampshire 03867-3413 Phone: 1-603-335-2062 Email: ron.toth@timepassagesnostalgia.com . I found something I always wanted to do, Carson said. share. CARNAC: May a weird doctor join you at the hump of a camel.

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